Confidential RSVP counselors are available 24/7

24/7 Emergency Support

If you need immediate medical care or are in danger, please call:

  • On Campus:  314-935-5555
  • Off-Campus:  911

In the moment emotional support, please call:

  • Provident WashU:  314-935-6666
  • SARAH Peer Counseling during the academic year: 314-935-8080

Though each situation and experience is personal, many reactions are shared by people who are victims of sexual assault and/or relationship violence; it is normal to expect some or all of these emotions. 

The following is a list of common responses resulting from the trauma of sexual assault and/or relationship violence. However, it is important to remember that reactions are individual and yours may not be captured by this list.

Fear responses

The most common reaction to sexual assault or relationship violence is fear. This fear generally includes a fear of being further physically injured, or even of being killed. Fears can include:

High startle effect around people or noises, leading them to be “jumpy” due to continued fear of danger
Avoiding people, places and things that remind them of the assault 
Fear responses activated by sounds, smells, certain colors, thoughts, etc.

Disbelief or denial

The shock of being harmed is difficult to believe and comprehend. Denying that the incident happened can be a way people manage emotions and continue to function. 

Loss of control

After experiencing sexual assault or relationship violence, it is common to feel a loss of control over your life. Individuals have experienced harm and actions against their will, which took away their control. This feeling of losing control may continue post-assault, and may lead to distrust in people and systems, as well as an inability to trust oneself. 

Flashbacks

Victims may re-experience the harm over and over again through ruminating thoughts and/or dreams, or through physical sensations, such as trembling or feeling sick. When this happens, it often feels like the assault is actually occurring again. 

Difficulty concentrating

Victims of sexual assault or relationship violence can experience difficulty with concentration and focus. This is a normal reaction to trauma and can be very frustrating, particularly in an academic setting.

Guilty feelings

It is normal to try to make sense out of a situation that is nonsensical. People sometimes blame themselves because there seem to be no answers. Victims may assume blame with feelings like:

“I shouldn’t have gone to that party.”
“I shouldn’t have been drinking.”, or
“I should have been more aware of my surroundings, or checked the lock on my door.”

Victims may also feel guilty that they:

Didn’t leave or fight back, despite the fact that trauma paralyzed them at the time, making them unable to leave or fight 
Engaged in behaviors they had to engage in to survive

They may have engaged in activities to protect themselves from additional harm or death

Feeling “dirty”

Sexual assault is invasive and personal. Many victims report taking  frequent showers to “wash it off” because they feel “dirty”.

Depression

Another common reaction to sexual assault is a sense of sadness or depression. There may be feelings of hopelessness and despair, frequent crying, and even thoughts of suicide. The things that previously brought joy or interested them seem to be lost in the sadness. 

Disrupted relationships

Post assault, there may be disruptions in relationships. Due to the reactions listed above, individuals may isolate and become withdrawn. This is most commonly associated with guilt, shame, and depression. Understanding from an individual’s support system is crucial during this time. While they may be pushed away, giving them space and being there when they need you is important to healing and recovery. 

Due to social complicating factors, some groups may be affected uniquely by sexual assault